It’s Just Not Meant For Me…

Mar 3

It’s the end of another work day, you’re sat at your computer, it’s dark outside, the to do list has a few highlighted through tasks done, but there’s still ton of emails, a ton of “can you just” teams messages, a ton of demands in amongst the scattered papers, and the half drunk cups of coffee are a reminder that when you trudge downstairs out of your work from home office, the dishes, the house chaos, the pile of washing and the overflowing dishes will grab you into another list of to dos. SERIOUSLY!

I say this not to remind you, wind you up or have you locking yourself in the nearest bathroom rocking in a corner, but more as a calls to arms to say “I’m with you”. Sure, we may be hiding from the carnage and demands of “mummmmm” [or insert your own name], but regardless of location, I know we’re both thinking *Can everyone just &^%$ off for a second*.

I mean, let’s have a truthbomb…Social media will have us thinking that we rise out of bed, head to the gym and then fresh faced and glowing, we effortless slip into an outfit that hugs the body, saunter down for a nutrition packed smoothie concoction and start work at our immaculately clean instagrammable office adorned with colour coordinated stationary and statement motivational prints. Not that we need motivation, we ARE the motivation.

Reality (or some version of)… The alarm goes off, we peel our birds nest head of hair off the pillow, feeling like it can’t be more than an hour since we lay down, we meant to go to the gym but that requires finding a pair of leggings without holes and just feels like another effort *Tells self “we’ll go tonight”*. We grab the nearest comfortable thing (side note isn’t stretchy fabric amazing?!) and as we walk past the mirror we make a mental note to book that hair appointment (when we have time). Downstairs a very strong coffee is inhaled as we hollah at the partner/kids/dog to sort themselves out for once before sprinting upstairs to the office that is still awash with random papers, half drunk cups of coffee and an increasing number of emails in the box, and “sweet jesus it’s only 9:05am - do my colleagues not sleep?!”. Sure there’s a statement motivational print that indeed reminds you of your mantra “Not My Circus, Not My Monkeys”.

Ooft, I get it. You aren’t ungrateful. You know that compared to many in this world you are blessed to have all the choices and options, but at the same time you’re frustrated AF. Frustrated that despite the title, the package, the seniority and all the external glam that others perceive is your amazing life, you know it isn’t all that. Something is missing. You battle with the “who am I to be moaning” with “%$£@ seriously, another day of this groundhog life? Another day of fighting more fires than Fireman Sam? Another day of convincing myself that this is my professional path. Another day of convincing myself that I have the perfect life that others would love. Another day of the mantra *Suck it up Princess, many women would kill for the life you have*.

… But it’s also another day of the devil on your shoulder. Well not quite the devil, more the sassy version of yourself who speaks the truthful words that you push down because, well common sense, practicalities and all that. The version of you that has unwavering belief that all those things that light you up, all the things that fill you with joy, all the things that you’d love to do if only you could shake the ‘IT’S JUST NOT MEANT FOR ME’ stories that repeat on loop in your mind.

So if you’re talking yourself out of doing the things, changing the things, plot twisting the things or making a massive leap in alllll the areas that that nagging voice keeps reminding you is what you truly want to do, I’m here to be a reminder. Kind of like an impartial cheerleader who has your back no strings attached, the one who won’t ever allow you to dumb down your dreams, or talk yourself out of the BS based story of ‘IT’S JUST NOT MEANT FOR ME’.

Lady, I’m saying this with a huge dose of love, but if you’re fed up of living that Groundhog Day, accepting, always busy, but not always inspired, I’m here to tell you - You’re allowing this to happen. I get it, I’m guilty of it too, but I’m go to save you even one more day of this loop… You can make any change you want, big or small and you don’t even have to be inspired to start with, you just have to take action, make a change, do something different and watch the ripple effect. I bet you’ll be inspired when you see some changes.

Still not convinced? Think I’ve gone uncharacteristically ‘woo’, bear with me. Those stories above - forget the social media *perfect* one, it’s like a unicorn - no real, think about your own story,the story of what WILL be.

Right now, the emails, the teams messages, the penicillin growing cups, the piles of washing up, everything can wait. Right now, go old school pen and paper or open a new document and re-write that start of your day, your ideal day, no filter, no reality, what you’d want to be doing.Struggling? I’ll make it easier, here’s some prompts to take the thinking out of it:

What time do you wake up?
What’s your morning routine? Workout, meditate, journal, snooze, walk etc?
What do you have for breakfast?
What time do you start work?
What are you doing for work? Your job, a new one, your own business?
What are you wearing?
What do you feel like?
What do you achieve in the day?

Feel free to add your own, get lost in your thoughts - no filter, no limitations. Then read it back. Read it again and again. Now what ONE THING can you do today to move you towards that life. It can be as simple as clearing your desk, or getting out of the stretchy comfies and into a power outfit that makes you feel unstoppable, or adding a slick of red lipstick or maybe exploring that business idea that you can be pushing down down. Bottom line is this; I’m not going to let you glide, not going to let you accept or settle, and I’m certainly not going to let you accept that ‘IT’S JUST NOT MEANT FOR ME’.

I’m in it with you. Your cheerleader, master simplify, anti BS, accountability assassin.